I’m definitely going.

I think I’m about due for a long ramble.

I’m moving to New York. In previous entries I may have seemed wishy washy or on the fence about the whole deal, but I’m not anymore. I’ve done my research, I’ve done my soul searching, and I’m going, man. I’m going.

The reasons that were pretty clear cut all along:
1. She’s out there, and I’m here. Long distance blows, and this relationship is for keeps.
2. One of my goals in life is to live in multiple places. Time is ticking away.
3. Generally, I consider myself more of a risk taker than not a risk taker.
4. Moving would require me to simplify my life by reducing my possessions drastically. This appeals to me.

However, there were reasons holding me back

1. I have a good job here. For my age, I rake it in, and when it comes down to it, I like my job more than I dislike it.
2. I know people here. I have [some] friends here.
3. I might be throwing away some rock and roll band opportunities with Mark.
4. I could end up starving out there due to lack of funds.
5. If I don’t get a ‘real job’ soon, I’d risk having a lack of health care, which really doesn’t work so well for me.

Recently, I’ve come to the following conclusions that refute the points illustrated above.

1. Yeah, it’s a good job. But shit, if this is the best there is, I’ve got bigger problems. It’s time to move on. I can get another job.
2. Yes, but my friends aren’t willing to put up with me 24/7, and she is. Maggie has a bit more pull in this situation.
3. True, and I’ll be sad to give that up. But you know, I’m making a choice and who knows how it’ll turn out. All I know is that the chances of Maggie and I working out are much greater than the chances of us forming a hit band and making it huge. If I want to be in a band, I can work on doing that in NYC.
4. I’m not an idiot. I’ve got side jobs going, and the main one I’ve got has agreed to employ me long distance, and put me on a $1000/month retainer. $1000 a month should at least cover my portion of our rent plus a little extra. I can find a slack job in the mean time to finding a better job. I’ve never really had a problem making money, I’ve just had a problem keeping money.
5. I just found out from work that I can get COBRA for $140/month. I can handle that for a while.

Oh, here’s something that happened the other day that also fueled this decision and increased my hope of getting into a school environment again: I heard the Price Is Right theme song on the radio.

Doesn’t seem like much, does it? But it made me realize that I hadn’t seen the Price is Right in over 2 years! That really depressed me. For 2 years I’ve been working and didn’t have the chance to watch fabulous pricing games. That realization just made me want a less structured schedule again. I’ve got the 8 to 5 blues. Put me back in school.

I haven’t even put my application in for Columbia yet, but hopefully that’ll go well. I really hope I get in. But you know, if I don’t… I’m still going to New York.

December 9th. Start planning the going away party now.